Baby Girl has been kicking up a storm lately. It's really the most amazing feeling ever, I don't think I'll ever get tired of it. Her little "hello!" thumps are without a doubt the highlight of my day.
Best of all, G felt her kick for the first time last night! He has been putting his hand on my belly trying to feel her for a few days, but every time he's done it before she is quiet as a mouse. Last night she obliged with a nice big thump for him, much to his surprise! It was so cool to see him have this new experience with her...I feel like we're turning into a family.
So my latest conundrum is whether or not to have my mom at the hospital with us during labor. G and I already decided that we want it to be just the two of us for the actual delivery, so we get to see her together first, before anyone else does. But I have had it in my mind that I need at least one other person with me for the labor, in case it's too much for G or just to be an extra voice of encouragement...and I had pretty much decided on my mom, but after she said something that really upset me last night I remembered that sometimes she can really bring me down, and I definitely don't want that happening while I'm in labor. It's so hard to plan for something that you've never done, never even come close to doing...how do I know what will be best for me?? Right now the only person I can think of that I absolutely unequivocally want in the room is G. I'm starting to think that maybe I don't need anyone else but him there...and how amazing would it be to have it be something that only we share.
I'd love to hear people's thoughts or experiences with this sort of thing -- WW the Blogosphere D?
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8 comments:
I think that if you want other supportive people around you it is THE MOST AMAZING experience to share with another human being.
If you want it to stay intimate with you and G....then don't worry...there will be plenty of support from the staff that G can just stand back and enjoy the ride.
Remember.....if they come in, they are going to see your vajayjay....and all sorts of other good stuff :)
I've been feeling little thumps for the last week or so, and it is so wonderful. At first it creeped me out, but now I look for it all day.
As for the laboring, I feel some of the same concerns that you do. I know that my mother will expect to be there, but I'm afraid she will just make me anxious, not because we aren't close (we are), but because I'm afraid she'll be too clingy and overattentive. I've been thinking of hiring a doula (a professional birth attendant.) A doula's job is to make you as comfortable as possible during labor, and she knows all the tricks. She is also an objective person who could kind of mediate between you and others who want to be there, but hopefully, without getting in the way. It's something to look into.
yeah, I'm struggling with the same question. I know my mom wants to be here - she's mentioned a few times that she will jump on a plane as soon as she hears I'm in labor. But we've never really talked about it. J and I have talked about it - and both agree that we don't want other people there. But I don't really know how to bring this up with my mom.
If I end up with a c-section I think the decision will be made for us - I think they only let you have 1 person in the room anyway.
I dont think that I want anyone but hubby in the room with me. I love my mother but she is the biggest drama queen that I have ever met (or came out of). My husband is the only one that I can imagine who will not make me nervous. :)
Good luck- and it must be great to feel that beautiful little girl kicking inside of you- i cant wait till I feel it!
Doula.
If mom has the potential to annoy, don't have her with you until after baby gets here. Hire a doula who is trained in the best ways to support a mom in labor. If DH needs a break you'll still have someone there just for you.
Very cool that he got to feel the thump finally. So funny that they all seem to get quiet when Daddy puts their hand on the belly.
Doulas rock! They make help husbands do a better job & keep the grandmas from freaking out.
When I was in labor with Child, it was just Husband and I (plus the midwife and the nurse). I would not want it any other way. My mom is prone to over-reacting, and I think she would have driven me insane. Plus, being a mother myself, I think it would be very, very difficult to see your child in so much pain, even though you know that the pain is for a good cause. I think your midwife will provide the support you and J need--without too much of an emotional connection or drama that mothers can bring. Just my two cents.
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